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Do Ghosts Appear to Us During times of Grief?
After reading my book, Helping Ghosts, a grief counselor, Kim, contacted me to share her
thoughts about it. I decided to ask her some questions about grief and ghosts. Her response
was both surprising to me and refreshing, especially with her grief counseling experience.
“It's not uncommon for the bereaved to experience feelings or have experiences after their
loved one passes that makes them wonder if it was a 'visitation' or are they simply 'going
crazy' because of grief symptoms,” said Kim. “People will report hearing their loved one or
sensing their loved one's presence after their death.”
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When people suffer from grief caused by the
loss of a family member or friend, it is quite
common for ghosts of loved ones to be seen,
felt, or even heard. Science would label such
experiences as "grief hallucinations," but are
they always figments of our imagination? Are
ghosts and spirits of our loved ones visiting us?
Through her many counseling sessions, I could
tell Kim had formulated thoughts about this, too.
“Although this is a very common symptom of
the grief process, Kim said, 'Helping Ghosts'
may explain and/or add another dimension to
the explanation of these experiences.”
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Our dead certainly stay with us, for we would all agree they remain in our hearts and minds.
Although rarely discussed, this phenomenon of ghosts being experienced during times of
grief is quite common. It is considered to be a normal reaction during bereavement,
something personal and often kept as a secret. Some might fear that sharing such an
experience could result in people labeling them as "nuts."
Grief researchers, such as Agneta Grimby of the University of Goteborg, note that over 80
percent of the elderly who have lost their partner do experience feeling their presence with
them in some form or fashion. The presence may become so real that grieving people who
experience ghosts of loved ones will often answer back to them.
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Disagreeing in part with scientists who label all
these experiences as illusions, I would offer that
communication with spirits of our loved ones is
both healing for the person grieving and the
ghost of the person who is likely concerned
about family and friends who are still suffering
pain from their recent, earthly departure.
Kim agrees with me, expressing that, “'Helping
Ghosts' may also encourage people in their
conversations with their loved ones to help
direct them in their afterlife as well as add
peace for both the departed and bereaved.”
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Certainly, some ghost sightings are hallucinations. I cannot disagree with that, but other
sightings, in my opinion, are true spirit visitations from the other side of the grave. Because
ghosts are the spirits of people, it only makes sense that they, too, must be concerned for
those who are grieving over their death. I am of the opinion that grieving people can
unknowingly keep loved ones in spirit from moving forward in their life journey. Some ghosts
remain behind out of concern, not willing to leave until they know their family member or friend
has healed from the loss. Then, the ghost may feel free to move on.
Most ghost sightings witnessed during times of grief are positive, comforting experiences.
The phenomenon can be found across cultural lines, indicating it is not something isolated to
a particular faith. This should be a red flag to researchers that perhaps visits from ghosts are
something real. Of course, such experiences might be interpreted differently, dependent upon
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one's cultural beliefs. No matter which side of the fence you might find yourself on regarding ghost sightings during
periods of grief, it should be noted that the experience itself must play an important role in human lives. It is
something that is evidently needed in order to help us heal.
My work in attempting to understand why ghosts remain here with the living has taught me that our fears can grab
hold of us, shackling us to the past and in a perpetual place of emotional suffering. If we can learn anything from this,
then let it be that we need to work through life's issues and choose not to carry unnecessary emotional baggage
around with us. Otherwise, we unwittingly choose to suffer until we decide to view things differently.
“Most importantly, Helping Ghosts really brings home the point of why it is so important to work through and
resolve issues in this life versus bringing them into the next,” says grief counselor Kim. - LC
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Ghosts & Grief Copyright 2010 Angels & Ghosts, LLC
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